Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize
