road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
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