In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I wish my penis had an off switch
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
