oh god the rape fog is back!
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
