my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
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