if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
