Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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