I'm eating all of the evidence.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
