I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Randomize
