He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Houston, we have a squirter
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Randomize
