..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
We named our party play list daddy issues
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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