"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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