Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
