This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Masturbated furiously for a half hour; ate a fistful of chocolate, then took a nap. Woke up and finished wrapping presents. I've got this holiday thing down.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
