just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize