i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Randomize
