I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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