Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
So many bounce houses so little time
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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