How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
