my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
We have started to decorate penises.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Randomize