So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
