for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize