sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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