I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
