Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
