he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
