he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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