it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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