Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
