You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Sacagawea was the original milf.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Randomize
