it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
