Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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