I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I understand Curling. That high.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
