dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
Randomize