i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
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