I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize