It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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