good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
