I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Randomize
