she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
