sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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