we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
