I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I love you. Go after that dick
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
