i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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