Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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