You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
