office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
Randomize
