make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
