Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
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