After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
