He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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