I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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