Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Randomize
