if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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